Below is the story of Vanessa* a child who was selected for Friends of the Children – Portland as a kindergartner and who is showing signs of positive change from his relationship with her Friend Leah*, and her involvement in the program.

CHILD STORY: Vanessa & Leah

Vanessa is a bright, charismatic girl entering 2nd grade who has few sources of stability in her life.  Vanessa was selected from her kindergarten class to receive a Friend because she was behind academically, and although she formed great relationships with classmates, she was having trouble attracting adult advocates due to behavior problems in class.  Once her Friend Leah started working with Vanessa she began to uncover some of the reasons why this young girl was struggling.  Her parents, while both loving and dedicated to Vanessa, were going through a tumultuous divorce and Vanessa was often a witness to domestic violence.  Her mother has a known history of alcohol abuse and both parents often display erratic, inconsistent behavior and have trouble holding jobs.  These factors have caused rapid changes in housing for the family, which in turn affects Vanessa’s education.  This fall Vanessa will enter her sixth school in her two short years of schooling.

At first, Vanessa was hesitant to form a relationship with Leah.  The family was also slow to let Leah into their lives, but by displaying consistency and determination, Leah has made inroads.  Changing schools frequently has obviously been rough on Vanessa, and Leah has done her best to represent a consistent positive role model when it comes to her education.  Before Vanessa was to be enrolled at a new school, Leah would take Vanessa to the school playground where they would play and have a picnic.  Getting Vanessa acclimated to her new surroundings was the goal and Leah feels it has been successful. When asked about how Vanessa has adjusted to the school changes, Leah says “She handles it fairly well.  One thing that is particularly hard on her is leaving her classmates behind.  She is a very loyal friend.”  To address this challenge, Leah does her best to connect Vanessa with other Friends of the Children program youth who were selected from the same class as Vanessa.  “It’s another way for her to experience stability and consistency,” says Leah.

To address Vanessa’s poor academic performance, Leah has learned Vanessa’s interests and learning style and has capitalized on that.  Vanessa has always showed a propensity for physical activity, so Leah has helped her enroll in jiu jitsu classes twice a week, and they often play tennis together.  Leah also uses innovative hands-on learning tactics that appeal to Vanessa.  One day at the library Leah noticed a puppet stage and decided to use the puppets to help Vanessa learn a school assignment.  Vanessa loved it!  Now Leah looks for other kinesthetic learning opportunities for Vanessa.

Now when Vanessa speaks of her Friend she says she “can’t imagine life without her.”  Leah hopes that their positive relationship will allow Vanessa to trust other adults. “I think a lot of Vanessa’s troubles will disappear as she matures.  She is savvy and has a certain star-quality about her.  She just needed a Friend,” says Leah.

* Names have been changed to protect our program youth.